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  • Theresa Gray

Why it's so hard to dump our bad habits

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Our lives are filled - with activities, people, clutter, mental stress. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you’re like me - and that a ‘normal’ day isn’t the time to do any major revamping. Sometimes even thinking about changing on a future day is overwhelming. In this article I want to discuss why we love our bad habits, why we love to hate them, and share a motivational speech telling us why we should say, “Goodbye” ASAP!

Look at this list of top New Year’s Eve Resolutions:


American’s top New Years Resolutions (2016)

• Enjoy life to the fullest (45.7%)

• Live a healthier lifestyle (41.1%)

• Lose weight (39.6%)

• Spend more time with family and friends (33.2%)

• Save more, spend less (30.1%)

• Pay down debt (27.5%)


It’s already August, and I wonder how Americans are doing?

Take a sneak peek around and do an assessment.


Do people look healthier or skinnier than they did in January?

Do they seem happier and enjoying life more?

Have you noticed people paying down debt and decreasing spending (you’ll know this one because they say weird things like, “no, it’s not in the budget”)?


I hope that you are in that rare group that you are able to say, “Yes, people are happier, skinnier, healthier, and are enjoying family and friends in a debt free way!”

Because, odds are, that if you hang out with those people you will be doing all those things too!

One of my favorite quotes from my dad is, “Theresa, you can’t fly with the eagles if you are hanging out with the turkeys.”

Fly with the eagles

Why it’s hard to let go of bad habits.

The people you hang out with influence your behavior. If you hang out with smokers, then you probably smoke too. If your friends like to shop for entertainment and dress in haute couture then you probably spend a lot of money just like them. If you hang out with turkeys, don't be surprised that you're not an eagle.

Bad habits are also attractive to you because they're yours! It’s something you're familiar with and so you are accustomed to that thing (bad habit, bad relationship, bad work situation, bad lifestyle choices, bad etc.)! It's comfortable. Dave Ramsey has a funny line in one of his classes where he compares us to a toddler wearing a poopy diaper who doesn’t want to be changed. “I like it because it’s warm, and it’s mine”. (Kind of a gross visual, but it always makes me giggle. Homer Simpson would say, “It’s funny because it’s true!”)

People fear change. Even if the change is going to get you a better life, it's hard to give up the familiar. Think about that person who keeps putting money into a car and complaining about it, but doesn't even consider selling it and starting fresh with a different car! Or, consider that friend who hates their job but doesn't ever look for a new one. We get comfortable with what we know, even if we don't like it.

Bad habits take time to fix. If you are feeling like your life is like a hamster wheel, you probably feel intimidated to ‘add’ something hard. And, honestly, it can be hard to change!

Bad habits

To finally get fed up with status quo and make a specific plan to change, you need to look at the ugly parts of your life and decide that you hate them. Sometimes it’s easier to shrug it off and say, “it’s not that bad” or “mine isn’t as bad as hers” or “I’ll take care of that problem when…..”.


Why we love/hate our bad habits

Friends do it

It might be wrong, but it’s comfortable, i.e. it's 'mine'

Change is scary

It saves us work, because change is hard

We don’t want to look too closely at what we know is wrong


I can tell you that any time I’ve truly stopped ‘automatically living’ and assessed my situation and made a change, I’ve been well rewarded. It can seem painful at the time, but you have a better life waiting for you! Tell your bad habits goodbye and let them go! Get rid of the stuff that weighs you down and fill up that space with good stuff! ​

You might be feeling pretty smug right now because you don't have that many bad habits! So for you I want to challenge you with a question. What if you are in a good place but you are meant to be someplace better?

Don't be afraid of change

I want to share this sermon with you by Bishop T.D. Jakes and I hope it motivates you!

The Gift of Goodbye

T. D. Jakes

There are people who can walk away from you.

And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you:

let them walk.

I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can’t make them stay.


And it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you’ve got to know when people’s part in your story is over so that you don’t keep trying to raise the dead.

You’ve got to know when it’s dead.

You’ve got to know when it’s over. Let me tell you something. I’ve got the gift of goodbye. It’s the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in goodbye. It’s not that I’m hateful, it’s that I’m faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He’ll give it to me.

And if it takes too much sweat I don’t need it. Stop begging people to stay.


If you are holding on to something that doesn’t belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to…


If you are holding on to past hurts and pains…


If someone can’t treat you right, love you back, and see your worth…


If someone has angered you…


If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge…


If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction…


If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents…


If you have a bad attitude…


If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better…


If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship.……


If you keep trying to help someone who won’t even try to help themselves…


If you’re feeling depressed and stressed…


Get Right


Get Left,

think about it,


Let it go!

  • Say goodbye to complaining and start to enjoy life to the fullest

  • Say goodbye to ignoring your body and start to live a healthier lifestyle

  • Say goodbye to over-eating, poor nutrition choices, and under-exercising and lose the weight you wanted to lose

  • Say goodbye to overworking and overcommitting and start to spend more time with family and friends

  • Say goodbye to your credit cards and begin to save more, spend less

  • Say goodbye to your debt and make a plan to pay it off

break your bad habits

#stoplivingpaychecktopaycheck #overspending #financialwellness #needs

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